Betrayed by Trust: How I Confronted My Husband Over Nanny’s Photos

A 28-year-old woman shared her family drama on Reddit, asking for advice. She’s a mom to an 11-month-old baby. One day, she and her husband hired a nanny to take care of their daughter. But the woman suspected the nanny was also interested in her husband after finding some flirty photos of the nanny among his things.

They just wanted a good nanny for their baby:
The woman said she was new to Reddit, but her little sister suggested she post her story there. She’s 28, her daughter Cassie is 11 months old, and her husband Alex is 35. After giving birth, she went back to work as a psychologist because she never wanted to be a stay-at-home mom.

She’s originally from France but lives in the US now. After 4 months of maternity leave (she had a difficult birth), they started looking for a nanny to take care of Cassie while they both worked. They interviewed a few people, and then one of Alex’s coworkers recommended his daughter, Liv, who had dropped out of college. Liv is 20 years old.

The woman said everything seemed fine, except she noticed Liv got really close to Cassie. She thought it was nice at first, as the two seemed to get along well. But it was also clear that Liv had a crush on Alex. She would laugh, giggle, and bat her eyelashes around him, but the woman didn’t worry too much because she felt confident in her relationship. Even Alex would laugh it off with her.

But one night, while Alex was giving Cassie a bath, he asked his wife to do something on his phone, and she saw some photos from Liv pop up. They were very flirty — Liv was in lingerie, posing provocatively. The woman checked the message history and saw that Liv had been sending these types of photos for a while.

Alex never replied to the messages, but the woman thought he could have deleted texts. When she confronted him, he got defensive and told her to stop trying to “psychoanalyze” him.

Upset by his reaction, the couple argued, waking Cassie. The woman packed a bag for Alex and kicked him out. She told him not to come back until he gave her some real answers. She also thought about taking Cassie to France to stay with her family for a while. However, Alex’s mom and friends were texting her, saying she was overreacting and the texts were harmless. But the woman felt disrespected and didn’t want to let it slide.

After visiting her family in France, they agreed that she should move back with Cassie. They offered to help with the move and legal matters.

When she returned to the US, she told Alex (who she initially called her husband but was actually her fiancé) that there was no chance of reconciliation. They signed an agreement that she would have primary custody of Cassie and make most decisions for her. Alex thought she would change her mind once they were in France, but she had made up her mind and moved on.

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