Do you fart in bed ?

If this story doesn’t make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I’ll pray for you. This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn’t stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room.

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, “Honey you were right… all these years you have warned me and I didn’t listen to you.” “What do you mean?” asked his wife. “Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in……………….…..”

Don’t just keep it, share it along on Facebook!

Related Posts

WHAT HAPPENED TO JIM CARREY?

SEE IT BELOW Jim Carrey, the Hollywood icon, may retire soon, admitting, “I have to get out of here before I snap.” He faced backlash for refusing…

BREAKING: Trump Announces New Nominee For Attorney General

President-elect Donald Trump announced that former Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi will be his new nominee for U.S. attorney general after Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) withdrew his…

Mark Harmon Tried to Keep His Disease a Secret, Now We Know

Mark Harmon, the beloved actor best known for his role as Leroy Jethro Gibbs on NCIS, has been a fixture in Hollywood for decades. Despite his long…

Emergency services rush to help Brigitte Bardot after a call informing that her health had taken a turn…..

Emergency services rush to help Brigitte Bardot after a call informing that her health had taken a turn….. Brigitte Bardot is probably one of the most well-known…

Jennifer Grey felt ”invisible” after facial transformation – her nose job made her ‘anonymous’…

Jennifer Grey felt ”invisible” after facial transformation – her nose job made her ‘anonymous’… Getty Images Jennifer Grey, who played “Baby” in the iconic film Dirty Dancing,…

At 94, Robert Wagner Finally Confesses the Shocking Truth We’ve All Been Waiting For”?

In the annals of Hollywood, certain names are forever linked with scandal, and Robert Wagner’s is no exception. Despite his fame as the dashing star of TV’s…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *